|One of my favorite places to spend my life.|
This prompts some guilt in me, as our teacher admitted it did for her as well. I don't think I'm a sloth about how I my use my time--in fact, I tend to be kind of hypersensitive about it, but seriously--sometimes youtube can be so distracting (am I right??). More than that, I feel like we have so much abundance and therefore so many options in front of us that I get nervous about it and worry that I won't choose what is best in the moment. So I waste a lot of time stewing about how to best spend my time. Oh, the irony.
Our teacher suggested today that rather than ask, "Is this how I want to spend my time?" we should ask, "Is this how I want to spend my life?" For some reason, thinking about that slight shift in phrasing really relieves some anxiety. Because even though I might not recognize what might be the most fulfilling in a certain moment, I do recognize what I want my life to reflect as a whole...and somehow keeping that broader perspective makes me feel like I can be a better judge of my time. I know that we are always taught to have an eternal perspective, and I get that, but what I forget is that it's not just a path to eternity, it's MY path to eternity. I want to live a consecrated life knowing what gifts and interests God has instilled in me and letting my life express that. I suspect that asking, "Is this what I want my life to be about?" is going to help me feel more grounded and also more meditative in a non-wasting time kind of way. I think it's always good to think about the person I am becoming.
I love this quote by Elder Maxwell, from a talk I mentioned not too long ago. In speaking of Christ he said, "I thank Him for His marvelous management of time, for never misusing a moment, including the moments of meditation. Even His seconds showed His stewardship."
I want my seconds to show my stewardship and knowing that I will fail, I'm grateful for repentance and the opportunity to try a little harder.
I hope we can all spend our lives well this week...and that those weeks turn into months...and into years that become a life well-lived. I love you all!